November 1998
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ADVENTURES IN MATURITY


by Gordon Dymowski

It's November, and you know what that means: no, not November sweeps, where all the TV shows do wacky things, but Thanksgiving. That's right, the holiday where the family all gets together, stuffs their faces with food, and plops their dead asses in front of the TV for football, soaps, or what have you. This comes from hundreds of years ago, where Pilgrims and Native Americans sat down for food, and later the Pilgrims donated some smallpox infested blankets for the Native Americans to use. But thinking back, here's all that I, personally, am grateful for, in no particular order:

1) MY FAMILY, FRIENDS, ETC. - That goes without saying. If it weren't for these people, I probably would be in a straightjacket banging my head against a wall. Trust me on this.

2) THE SHRUBBERY - Yes, this is where I get to suck up to my editors. This is a damn funny 'zine, even if I didn't write for it. I really dig that Robot from the Future.

3) MY CAT, DAX - Ok, she's a little surly, but not as psychotic as my ex -fiance would have you believe. To see how cute Dax is, check out her home page here. Yes, I have no life.

4) I MISSED THE ENTIRE JERRY LEWIS LABOR DAY TELETHON - Thank God for small favors. 5) COFFEE - if it weren't for this miracle beverage, I could barely get anything done. That's how I write this column, by the way: I chug one or two full pots, and just begin ranting in a caffeine-induced psychosis. Coffee is legal, and it works better than crack. Trust me on this.

6) BUDDY BABYLON BY SCOTT THOMPSON - Read my review here. But trust me, this is *the* literary find of the year.

7) BUDDY FARO - I absolutely dig this series, which means that by the time you read this, it will be canceled. Starring Dennis Farina (a homeboy from my home town of Chicago) and Frank Whaley, it's about this Rat Pat-era detective who disappears for 20 years, then shows up back in the 1990s. The best way I can describe it is "Raymond Chandler and Joey Bishop write an episode of TWIN PEAKS" (Well, it's not *too* far off the mark - it was created by TWIN PEAKS's Mark Frost). It's on 9 pm EST/8 pm CST on CBS - check your local listings. Trust me, you will not regret it ...

8)STARMAN - This has to be one of the greatest comics ever written.... because it's quiet. It's the story of Jack Knight, the reluctant inheritor of the Starman mantle. Written by James Robinson and drawn by (until recently) Tony Harris, this comic deemphasized guys in tights beating the hell out of each other, and was a triumph in characterization and plot. Plus, thanks to trade paperback collections Sins of the Father and A Wicked Inclination, you don't have to worry about scouring the bargain comic bins.

9) EUGENE, OREGON WEATHER - In the winter, the worst it gets is about 50 degrees, gray, and rainy. In Chicago, it gets to 300 below zero, with icy winds, and twelve feet of snow. You do the math.

and even though I've been through a hell of a lot this year, I'm sure as hell thankful that I'm not in a tin box six feet under. And friends, *that* is what life is all about.

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